Life is just a dream.

Dreams are today's answers to tomorrow's questions.


-Edgar Cayce

There is no yesterday or tomorrow as the Buddha teaches.  Only the now, that unfolds in front of us second by second.  Trying to live in anything but the moment is an affront to our God as if we are questioning the deity's plan past and future.  It shows a lack of trust in how things are to be and a human weakness built on fear that we must somehow know all that is to come.  That somehow that knowing will give us peace or an ability to live in the present more secure.  We must learn that there is no such state as good or bad that all things simply 'are' as they must be.  How those things affect our emotions make us who we are. 

I don't know how many people I've met in my life.  A thousand?  More, maybe less.  I doubt that I could list much more than a hundred by name.  Fewer more maybe by memory associated with a chance meeting or situation in which I was in contact with them.  A college professor or a passenger on a plane or maybe someone I met in a time of distress.  A funeral perhaps or car accident.  It's certainly the intensity of the encounter and the resulting emotions that made a lasting impression.   I don't try to remember people very often.  It's just my way of living a life less stressful and more in tune to the now and letting go of the past and the future to come.

If I could offer anyone any advice I'd say......live the life you've been given in the way your God made you.  Don't let negativity attach itself to you and don't allow other's emotions or anxieties affect the way you choose to go about your life.  Smile often with bright eyes and let your life unfold by the moment.

That's a Croc

“To be happy, it first takes being comfortable being in your own shoes. The rest can work up from there.”

-Sophia Bush

The amount of time I spend thinking about myself, means nothing to others.  I'd bet for the most of us we're thinking about ourselves most of the time either consciously or unconsciously.   I've come to the undeniable conclusion that we can't escape one another.  The only solution is to think less of yourself and more of others and to do this you must be comfortable in your own shoes.  That requires many things and not least of which is to live without fear of anything.  Also to not care what others think but still care about what others think.

An online questionnaire once asked if I were to be stranded on a deserted island what would I take with me.  I said my Crocs.  I have summer Crocs and winter Crocs.  Aside from my feet, they seem to also fit the Zen part of me. 

Cafe' con Leche

"I never drink coffee at lunch. I find it keeps me awake for the afternoon."

-Ronald Reagan


I don't know that my medium cup of McDonalds coffee with two cream and a Splenda would qualify as cafe' con leche but it works for me.  Now, I would have to agree with President Reagan that coffee keeps me awake but the afternoon is fine.  It is in the evening that it keeps my eyes wide open when I'm trying to go to sleep.  As a rule, I generally don't drink coffee after 6:00pm or I'll toss and turn into the wee hours.  I hear many say it has no effect on them but not me.

A revelation for me when it comes to coffee was how darn good sweets taste when accompanied by a good cup of coffee.  It clicked for me when I once combined a Pop Tart with my morning cup of coffee.  Doughnuts you ask, forget about it.  Pure heaven!  However, there's one pastry on my 'bucket list' to enjoy with a cup of coffee before I die and that would be the famous Sfogliatelle (sh- fee-a- tell), a hand made flaky layered Italian pastry with a sweet ricotta or french cream filling.   They are hard to find because they are so labor intensive to make.  In all my travels, I've yet to find one.  I did once call a Italian bakery in New York to see if they have them and did and they said they would mail me some.  I didn't take them up on it since I hope to get up that way. 

Off With His Head

“Do right. Do your best. Treat others as you want to be treated.”

-Lou Holtz

I can't help but notice all the media hype and gossip over whether Rich Rodriguez will be fired after an all out trouncing by Mississippi State in the 2010 Gator Bowl with a score of 52 to 14.  Also, adding insult to injury is the back story on his lack luster past three years as the head coach of Michigan.  Whether he's let go or not, one thing I do know is that Rich will grow from this and as I've already said, we grow fastest through pain and suffering.  My hope for the coach is that he finds what's truly important in his life and to me, it's not football. 

We all have our Gator Bowls in life and if were lucky we're forever changed for the better by the experience.  You just need to be able to rest assured you did the best you could and that you did your highest sense of right along the way.  When you put your head on your pillow at night, that and that alone will determine if you sleep peacefully. 

I'd like to see just one of these high profile coaches 'man up' and do something unbelievable in the face of being fired.  Quit football all together and do something entirely different.  Or if not leave football, maybe go coach a struggling small college team or even a no name high school team.  Make a point to show the world how absurdly insane our country has become with the obsession with winning at all costs and how important other things in our short lives can be.

Good luck Coach we'll check on you later.

Happy New Year!

"Be always at war with your vices, at peace with your neighbors, and let each new year find you a better person."

– Benjamin Franklin


Change is difficult, change is slow and change is not always lasting.  In this time of resolutions that the new year bring's, I say to lighten up on yourself.  Don't over resolve to change too much in the next year and to the contrary, simply take stock of the changes you've been able to successfully make already.  For the changes you wish to make I advocate keeping them to yourself.  Proclaiming them loudly for the world to hear only creates more undue stress on your success.  
 
If you want to make a change in an aspect of your life here are some approaches to consider.

• Write them in a journal or a blog so you can revisit your progress or struggles.
• Keep them quiet and make them yours.  Share with only trusted friends.
• Find a reason for the change beyond the obvious.  'Want to loose weight?' Avoid dieting, make a life long change in your eating habits for spritiual or ethical reasons.  Maybe go vegetarian or choose to avoid processed foods.  You don't have to be Muslim to not eat pork or Hindu to not eat meat.
• Find the good in failure.  Don't overgeneralize that everything aspect of an attempt failed.  Find some part that worked and dwell on the positive as you regroup.
• Seek professional help.  Life coaches, dieticians, physical trainers or a trusted buddy are all great.

Good luck and let me know if I can help.

Muckety-Muck

"Achievements on the golf course are not what matters, decency and honesty are what matter."

-Tiger Woods

They say we are a celebrity obessed culture. I'd say every culture in human history has been celebrity obessed. Every point and time in history has had their Tiger Woods, or Michael Jordon, or movie star or some celebrity archetype.  At a superficial level we want to believe that with all the fame and fortune their lives are free from worry and full of joy.

Very few of us have the recipe for a perfect life and even for the lucky few that do fame and fortune have little or nothing to do with it. The Tiger Woods of ditch digging, grocery bagging, burger flipping or toilet cleaning has just a good of a chance of being happy as any celebrity past or present. OK, but what about the money? The money has to make you happy, right? I would argue not and it's the simple things that matter most.

So what is the answer you ask?  I'll share with you what i think, but keep in mind the answers are simple but the doing is the difficult part.

1. Money.   No matter what you make, save some, give some away and spend the rest.
2. Time.   Get up early or stay up late but not both. Find time for others but  most important make time for yourself.
3. Work.   Do an honest days work, look people in the eye and smile. Never steal, not even money. Never lie, ever.
4. Leisure.   Do what you want, when you can and do something productive.  Don't worry if you happen to choose doing nothing.
5. Attitude.   Never fear, find the good in all things, don't talk about others, don't procrastinate.
6. Purpose.   Find your purpose in life, stay true to it and pursue it with vigor. 

Home for the Holidays

"Oh, There's No Place Like Home for the Holidays"

-Robert Allen & Al Stillman's 1954 Christmas Classic

Just as so many things stay the same, then so much changes over the years when it comes to celebrating Christmas with your family.  We all grow older and the circumstances of our lives change from year to year.  Some almost imperceptible others more dramatically and it is hard to appreciate the changes when you're in the present moment.  Then there are the traditions that fade away, those that stand the test of time and the new ones that emerge.  Those traditions remind us of our bonds with those still present and of those that have moved on as well as those that will carry on.  We care about those traditions because they give reason for those we care about to come back to us this one special time of the year.  They are also a testament to the fact that we were loved and that the love we give will be able to go on in those we care about.  We hope that when we are gone the traditions we formed will allow our loved ones to have more special Christmases to come.

You hear the phrase "I wish it could be Christmas all year long".  Well, why shouldn't it should be!  Why should we wait to do all the things the Holidays prompt us to do?  Send a card, give a gift, spend time together and talk of fond memories.  As it stands, we live too fast, think far too much of ourselves and not nearly enough of others all year long.  Then we try to cram all the 'reason for the season' into one compressed point of time and space. 

So what's the answer you ask?  So simple, slow down, take time to reflect, pray and meditate.  Live by a set of principles that make space in your day for just that.  Then why not live by the Christmas principles?  They work that one time of the year.  No where does it say you can't celebrate a little holiday every day.  Right?  Want some help?  OK here are some 'to-do's' for you:

• Pick a time of the day every day to pray, meditate or reflect in a positive way on the past, present and future.
• Send a gift at a date of your choosing to a person that won't expect it.
• Send a 'Thinking of You' card to someone during some point of the year.  (write specifically why you are thinking of them)
• Find a day to invite in family and friends for a good meal and to share stories.  Make it an annual tradition.

Good luck and may our God bless you.